Technology has evolved. Dating? It’s complex.

Moira Weigel embarked on a study of dating’s history in the early 2010s during a significant cultural period in the U.S. The repercussions of the Great Recession were still strongly felt, mobile applications were gaining momentum, and the internet buzzed with analyses critiquing the status of contemporary romance.

“There was this entire discussion regarding how the recession impacted men and women differently, undermining alleged traditional gender roles,” stated Weigel, assistant professor of comparative literature. “Simultaneously, there was a great deal of dialogue surrounding social media’s impact on romantic relationships. The crossroads of these subjects captivated my interest.”

The outcome was her debut book, “Labor of Love: The Invention of Dating” (2016), which aimed to contest certain bleak notions that matching applications were heralding the “demise of dating” or transforming it unrecognizably. Instead, she contended, courtship had progressed alongside women’s participation in the workforce and the rise of consumer capitalism.

Weigel, who became part of Harvard’s faculty in 2024, is instructing “Media, Technology & Social Change” and “Global Media” in the Department of Comparative Literature. While her present research concentrates on data-driven technologies such as social media and marketplace frameworks, along with innovations in AI and machine translation, she continues to be intrigued by shifts in technology and courtship.

In this edited dialogue with the Gazette, Weigel explores how dating has transformed over the years and the unexpected historical foundation for chatbot companions. (Spoiler alert: Dating anxiety is not merely a contemporary issue.)

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Nowadays, numerous dating applications feature highly customized algorithms designed to refine search criteria. What are the consequences of such a level of customization?

There exists a promise that accompanies these apps, especially as their user demographics have expanded and algorithms matured into more sophisticated and adaptable forms, that they will enhance the efficiency of courtship. Apps pledge to offer a broader range of potential partners than, for instance, your neighborhood bar, and to categorize them into tailored outcomes. The technical rationale bears resemblance to that of online marketplaces.

However, dating apps did not create this phenomenon. I frequently advocate against considering these inquiries too techno-deterministically, as though technology solely drives cultural transformation. In my research for “Labor of Love,” I investigated video dating archives from the 1980s, where individuals would record VHS tapes of themselves, organizing them in a collection where members could search based on various characteristics. People have been placing personal advertisements in newspapers for ages. The initial versions of Match.com or OKCupid primarily utilized intricate multiple-choice surveys to match individuals. Today, most prominent dating applications employ dynamic machine learning models to analyze different data points and adapt according to user interactions. Aspirations for scale, efficiency, and customization predate algorithms.

In what ways has technology influenced how individuals date and discover affection?

The narrative of love and the evolution of technology have consistently been intertwined: We could discuss the automobile, the telephone, or the steam engine as innovations that transformed courtship. Among contemporary, data-oriented technologies, I believe the normalization of mobile applications represents a significant shift. These have intriguingly blended the online with the offline realms. Reflecting on what we termed “cyber-dating” in the 1990s, shortly after the World Wide Web became widespread, many felt that the internet was another universe entered through their desktop computers. Much of the moral panic surrounding online searches for sexual or romantic connections stemmed from the belief that such interactions were “unreal” and would disconnect you from relationships deemed more suitable and meaningful. Nowadays, mobile devices and social applications have entirely blurred the line between online and offline experiences. Dating has become an activity accessible via your phone, alongside responding to work emails and ordering a taxi or a sandwich. This has led to numerous changes that are challenging to untangle.

What were some of these transformations?

I believe it has diminished much of the stigma previously associated with online dating or older practices like video dating. I think it has “re-rationalized” courtship, allowing people to feel more at ease with the concept that finding a partner is not solely reliant on spontaneity, instincts, and ease, but rather that there could be social scripts and search parameters at play.

Historically, has the quest for a partner leaned more towards romantic spontaneity or a logical search process?

Within the context of human history, the concept of selecting partners based on random encounters and individual characteristics is quite recent. It originated in the West during the 18th and 19th centuries alongside political and industrial revolutions that fostered new values regarding individuality, society, and autonomy.

Prior to industrialization, if you labored on a farm with your extended family, it made sense to marry someone from a neighboring farm to combine your assets and labor. After all, where else would you meet someone? Economic and technological advancements transformed the perception and role of love and marriage. It’s no coincidence that many of the significant novels of the 19th century were…

regarding the challenges of basing marriage on personal attractions and feelings. Consider “Elective Affinities” (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe), “Madame Bovary” (Gustave Flaubert), or “Anna Karenina” (Leo Tolstoy).

As time progressed, there developed an ideal of attraction and affection as being “anti-practical,” since it is meant to symbolize freedom, thrill, and the opportunities presented by contemporary existence. Charles Baudelaire’s “À une passante” (“To a Passerby”), reflecting on glancing at a stranger in the street, encapsulates the notion that in a city you can encounter anyone, who may become the love of your life, or perhaps you’ll never cross paths again. These ideals portray romance as the antithesis of calculation.

Algorithms inherently compute, and dating applications utilize them to enhance the search for specific types of partners. For me, this is where dating platforms introduce an explicit form of reasoning that feels distinct from the prevailing romantic notions of the last century or so.

In what ways are technologies such as generative AI and chatbots influencing dating practices?

What I have observed with dating applications reflects trends seen in all areas of the digital realm or economy. Anecdotally, I have heard of individuals utilizing chatbots to create numerous messages for others or employing AI to sift through such correspondences. There has long been a trend towards virtual dating helpers, akin to matchmakers, making it logical that individuals might implement GPTs to assist in this manner.

Another topic people discuss involves chatbot companions. This theme, of course, holds a rich historical backdrop.

Can you elaborate on that?

Numerous literary depictions of this fantasy of designing one’s ideal partner exist— a realization of dreams that often morphs into a sort of nightmare. We can reference the Greek and Latin myth of Pygmalion. Many tales of automated beings in 19th-century Europe are also relevant, ranging from E.T.A. Hoffmann’s “The Sandman” to Auguste Villiers de l’Isle-Adam’s “The Future Eve.” Going back even further, we could discuss Eve being fashioned from Adam’s rib as his companion. The complexity of this theme involving a human (traditionally a man) crafting the perfect mate fascinates me. It appears in films as well: classic works like Fritz Lang’s “Metropolis” (1927) or Ridley Scott’s “Blade Runner” (1982), not to mention recent films like “Her” (2013) and “Ex Machina” (2014) or the HBO series “Westworld.” All these narratives delve into what humans seek in one another and how we project our desires onto machines and creations. Strong emotional bonds can form with artificial entities, yet there’s always an undertone of risk and loss associated with such control. Therefore, even if something like Replika, the chatbot partner, may not appear particularly sophisticated on an intellectual level, it connects to this profound historical context.

What about individuals who feel disheartened by the current app dating culture? Is there any historical background for this sentiment?

A sense of turmoil is embedded in the essence of dating. Throughout the historical accounts I researched, there hasn’t been a time when people expressed, “It’s fantastic! It’s perfectly fine! I have no concerns!” At each juncture, there’s a prevailing worry regarding dating, which in turn fuels a plethora of cultural creation: self-help literature, romantic comedies, YA novels, alongside all the products companies market to assist individuals in feeling more attractive. This feeling of unease is, in fact, culturally and economically productive. Even as this aspect evolves, it seems to discover a way to persist.